Dad felt 'helpless' as daughter hid in bathroom after being forced to share bed with biological male

The father said, 'I've been hearing about all these issues [with transgender policies] ... I thought it was being a bit sensationalized.... And it came to our doorstep'

Colorado father recalls feeling 'helpless' in protecting his daughter

A Colorado dad represented by the Alliance Defending Freedom said he felt helpless after his daughter was forced to share a bed with a biological male.

Christian parents from Colorado have complained that their eleven-year-old daughter's school district allegedly forced her to share a bed with a biological male on an overnight trip. The dad told Fox News Digital in an interview he felt "helpless" to protect his daughter from the situation. 

The parents – Joe and Serena Wailes – said they discovered that Jefferson County Public Schools (JCPS) assigned their daughter to share a room with a biological male who identifies as a girl without notifying them or informing their daughter. The Christian legal group, Alliance Defending Freedom, sent a demand letter to JCPS on behalf of the Colorado parents, alleging that its policy of "hiding information from parents and lying to students is unconstitutional."

"It was a bit of a shock. It was a helpless feeling," Joe Wailes said. "Here I am… she was calling me and texting me from the bathroom because she didn't want the other kids to overhear what she was saying. So it's a pretty helpless feeling when your daughter is hiding in the bathroom, she's trying to convey a message to you, and you're 2,000 miles away and can't do anything."

The mom happened to have been on the trip and was able to intervene in the situation. 


dad felt helpless as daughter hid in bathroom after being forced to share bed with biological male

Alliance Defending Freedom sent a demand letter to Jefferson County Public Schools alleging their transgender policies were unconstitutional. (Alliance Defending Freedom)

"It was very frustrating because all along when we were planning the trip, we were told that boys were going to be on one floor of the hotel and girls were going to be on the other, and they were not allowed to intermingle," Serena said. "And so it never crossed our mind that this could possibly happen."

Joe said he couldn't imagine what would have happened if his wife hadn't been on the trip. 

"It's really difficult to think of our 11-year-old daughter, 2,000 miles away from home …trying to get the situation rectified on her own," he said. 

The incident allegedly occurred over the summer, when the district organized a cross-country overnight trip to Philadelphia and Washington, D.C.

The daughter found out the student she was sharing a bed with was transgender only because the student told her on the first night of the trip, according to Alliance Defending Freedom. 

"She was uncomfortable about the prospect of sharing a bed with a male student," the ADF stated. 


dad felt helpless as daughter hid in bathroom after being forced to share bed with biological male

Father Joe Wailes told Fox News Digital he felt "helpless" when talking with his daughter.  (Fox News Digital)

"The school chaperon asked the Wailes’ daughter if they could merely move her to a different bed rather than a different room," the ADF alleged. "While she was still uncomfortable with this arrangement, she agreed to try it for one night."

"It then took the girl and her parents multiple requests to get her moved to another room. And even then, chaperons told the girl to lie about the reason for her move because of the district’s overnight rooming policy — a policy that violates parental rights and student privacy by rooming students based on gender identity while hiding that information from other parents and students," the ADF's letter alleged. 

Fox News Digital reached out to the district for comment, and they said, "Because the district was only recently informed, and the trip occurred outside the school year and through a private travel organization, we are still determining facts. However, it appears that the student’s transgender status was not known when room assignments were made and our understanding is that as soon as their transgender identity was known, room assignments were adjusted. We are working with the private travel organization to learn more, and we anticipate a more detailed response by December 18 as ADF requests."

The other girls in the room were not informed about the biological male in their room, according to the ADF. 

"JCPS officials then decided to lie to her roommates, and instructed the Wailes’ daughter to do the same, telling her to say she needed to switch beds to be closer to the air conditioner," the ADF alleged. 


dad felt helpless as daughter hid in bathroom after being forced to share bed with biological male

Policies and issues surrounding transgender students have embroiled many schools across the country in controversies.  (Fox News Digital)

Eventually, the school chaperon decided to move the transgender student to another girls' room, according to ADF.

Fox News Digital previously reported that JCPS' equity policies had a methodical system in place to keep parents in the dark about their child's gender transition in schools. The student's gender would be used to determine where they would be placed for overnight trips. 

"Under no circumstance shall a student who is transgender be required to share a room with students whose gender identity conflicts with their own," the policy said. 

Joe said he was aware that transgender policies were being implemented around the country in K-12 education, but had no idea how big of a problem it was until it affected his family.

"The idea that that this could happen was just really not even on our radar. And frankly, on a personal note, I've been hearing about all these issues just like everybody else around the country. And I thought it was being a bit sensationalized. I didn't think it was happening that frequently. And it came to our doorstep," he said. "So we want to make sure that we share the story." 


"Parents, not the government, have the right to direct the upbringing and education of their children, and that includes making informed decisions to protect their child’s privacy," ADF senior counsel Kate Anderson said.

"They sent tons of paperwork related to these trips to parents and could easily inform them of such a policy confidentially and let parents work out what's best for them and their kids. But the way the district handles it right now, it put this fifth-grade girl [in a situation where she was]… hiding in a bathroom, calling her dad, trying to figure out how to deal with this because she was uncomfortable sleeping in the same bed as a biological boy," she continued. "And so that shouldn't happen. Every student's privacy is important, and every parent should be able to work through these things with their kids ahead of a trip like this."

Hannah Grossman is a Reporter at Fox News Digital.

Authored by Hannah Grossman via FoxNews December 6th 2023